t is for...

table- I use my parents first dining room table. They wanted something new, after my sister and I moved out. I could not imagine getting rid of something so sentimental. So my sons and I eat there, but no one sits on the chair w/ the seat that was scratched by my booster chair.

tangelos- way better than oranges.

tape recorder- I wonder if my grandkids will even know what that is.

tarantula- Josh had one as a pet for about a year.

teachers- there are good ones, and not so good ones.

television- I could prolly do w/o it, but my kids like to have a billion channels so they can watch the same shows on the same old channels. Guess it is a comfort thing. I do like court tv, lifetime and cmt.

Tennessee- I have always wanted to go there. I have a good friend who lives there. Hi Kristiegk!

tetherball- When Joel was in kindergarten and 1st grade, he played tetherball so much that his hand bled. It was an obsession to him.

Texas- My good friend Vivian lives in Texas.

thankful- I try to count my blessings.

thigh-my favorite piece of chicken.

thirties- I am almost done w/ my thirties,lol.

tiger- Someone told me once that you can't cage a tiger. What if he walks into the cage by himself??

tinker- my dad's life work

traditions- I love traditions.

traffic- hate it, that was a big reason I moved out of PHX.

u is for........

ultimate-The ultimate drink place is Sonic. The ultimate dog is the Chow Chow. The ultimate profession is teacher ( for w/o teachers there would be no other professions). The ultimate job is being a parent, since you are your child's first and most important teacher. The ultimate candy bar is the Hersheys Special Dark. The ulitmate pizza toppings are ham and pineapple.

uncertainty-These are uncertain times we live in. The longer I live the more uncertainty I feel. Of course 20 years ago- I knew everything. The only thing that is certain is that things change and people adapt. Good thing I might have finally figured that out.

uniform-I believe in non conformity. I believe that each of us has to walk our own path. I believe that a toddlers temper tantrum is one of the most important parts of a person's development. I do not believe that anyone, particulary school children should be required to wear a uniform. I personally follow rules and laws w/ almost an anal psychosis, but secretly cheer on those who push that envelope. ( I am obviously not talking about people who commit crimes and hurt other people)

unlikely-
It is unlikely that I will ever-
drink alcohol, smoke cigarettes, do drugs, or take narcotic prescription painkillers.
like raw onions
want to stop scrapbooking
totally understand my exes
want to give up caffiene
want to give up chocolate
be a size 7 again
change my opinions about some of my key beliefs
like the music my youngest son likes



uplift-I saw this quote the other day- " Nothing is worth more than the human soul".I am trying to remember that as I try not to let little things that don't really matter irritate me. Is Josh's soul more important than him having a clean room. Of course. Is Joel's belief that the world is a big and rosy place just waiting him to make his mark more important than giving him a dose of my reality? Of course. Is the extra couple of minutes it takes to help someone out worth any incovenience to me? Of course. So, let's try to uplift eachother not tear eachother down. Everyone is having a hard time- let's play nice.

V is for.............

vacuum- I dislike vacuuming. It hurts my wrists, plus I just hate it. Joel is our resident vacuumer. He is planning on bringing his laundry home from college next year for me to do,and he can vacuum for me. Good deal.

value- I value my family. I value my health. I value my peace. I value my intelligence.I value the time that I have left w/ my sons in this house.I value my photographs, videos and other memories.I value children. I value the new relationship and friendships I am developing.

vanilla- I love the smell of vanilla. I get all my smell good stuff in Bath and Body Works Warm Vanilla Sugar Scent.I only use real vanilla in baking. I use vanilla candles. And, last but not least, my life is "vanilla" and I like it that way.

Velveeta- I love this totally bad for you stuff. I know it is not a real food, and I just don't care. Yum yum yum!

view- I love the view from my kitchen window. It looks out on the Sawtooth Mountains, and I can see my birdfeeder and birdbath from there.

violence- I was a victim of domestic violence for 10 years. I stayed because I thought it was best for my children to live w/ both of their parents.I thought that I could work it out, after all my parents did not always agree and they have been married for 40 years. For most of that 10 years I was not really really afraid. I did not like it, I knew it was wrong but I did not live in fear every second. Towards the end of the relationship I was in fear. He said if I left he would kill me and I believed him.If you are reading this and you are a victim, take steps to leave so that you can be safe. It does not get better. You are stronger than you know and there are people to help you. He just does not want you to know that.

w is for...

whackadoodle- one of my favorite words, for anyone who is not rational, or if you do something dorky.

waffle- I prefer thin crispy waffles to those poofy belgin waffles.. and only Mrs. Butterworths syrup please.

waist- I have lost 35 lbs now... I almost have one.

The Waltons- I wanted to be Olivia, and have that big ol family. And that cool old truck.

waste- I try not to be wasteful, and to live light on this earth.

watch- I used to have this cool Taz watch. Now I just carry my phone and don't need to wear it anymore.

water- please please drink enough water. Your body will thank you for it.

weed- come on people- aren't we stupid enough??

white westhighland terriers- these cool little doggies that my parents and sister love. They have 5 between them and it is a hoot when they all get together.

west- southwest, to be exact... the only home I know.

wind- don't like it,I get scared if it is really windy.

wings- honey hot wings from Native New Yorker.... heaven on earth

wrong- I don't know as much as I did 20 years ago. I am wrong often now. I don't even care if I am wrong anymore. And, I think thats cool.

Well- I am done now...

x is for

x-ray- I have had lots of x-rays throughout my life. As a a pre-teen/teenager I had scoliosis so I had to have the curvature of my spine x-rayed on a regular basis. I sprained both my ankles in my lifetime and have had those x-rayed as well. Last time I went to the doctor I had just about every joint x-rayed. That was fun...

xylophone- I got to play the xylophone one week in marching band after I had had some oral surgery and was not able to play my piccolo. I love the way they sound.


X-rated- K, here are my thoughts on porn- ( not that you asked, mind you but there sure are not many words that start w/ X).I am personally neither offended nor turned on by porn. I do not believe it degrades women, I actually believe it degrades the men who look at it. I do not care if anyone else likes it, as long as everyone who is involved is an adult. I would not be upset if my man enjoyed porn, as long as he enjoyed me just a little bit more.

y is for-

yard sales- I used to love them, now I have way too much of my own crap to need to shop for someone elses,lol.
yogurt- I love yoplait vanilla yogurt. Nothing else will do.
yellow- I really like yellow flowers, particularly daffodils.
yes- I look for ways to tell my children yes. That way when I have to tell them no they know it is for a good reason.
yellow pages- I knew I was going to like my small town when I saw the phone book was only 8x10 and maybe an inch and a half thick. I moved from Phoenix where we had 3 really big ol heavy phone books.
yeah- I know it is bad grammar to use, but I say yeah all of the time.

z is for-

I was reading back through some old entries the other day and I realized I stopped doing the alpha thing. I of course can't remember where I left off so I figure I will start at the end and go backwards. That is usually how I operate anyway- going about something from the wrong side,lol.
anyway- z is for-
zoloft- I have several family members who take it and all I can say is I thank God for zoloft- what a difference it has made in their lives ( and mine)

zoo-I love going to the zoo.I used to take my boys there all of the time when they were small. One time, Joel was 19 months, Josh was newborn and their dad and I took them to the zoo. I was exhausted- and Joel was SO excited to be there. He loved every animal- did not want to miss a thing. He was resisting being in the stroller,and he always hated to hold my hand. I was almost in tears after being there for an hour or so. We walk up to the tiger exhibit, and there is a sweet little girl there, sitting nicely in her stroller. I was thinking to myself- why didn't I get one of those,lol. Her mom was watching Joel squeal and try to climb out of the stoller. I was trying to nurse Josh, and as usual their dad was somewhere w/ his head up you know where. I was telling Joel to be careful. I thought he was gonna flip the stoller over or take off on me. Her mom says to me "Man, I wish my daughter was that excited about the animals- she doesn't even seem to care that we are here". Isn't that funny- two people each wanting what they don't have.Joel has always been intense. Wonder where he gets it from. I did not realize it then, but I am definately not a girls mom. I would not be cut out for that!

zodiac- I love to read it for fun, and I am a typical Virgo, but I don't actually believe in astrology.

Zero- number of daughters I have, number of alcoholic drinks I have had, number of cigarettes I have smoked, and the amount of chocolate I have in the house right now.

What a day!

I had a flat tire this morning ( big bummer).

I somehow missed a call from my lawyer about my car accident ( bigger bummer,lol). Gonna have to call her back tomorrow.

I did get to see a good friend today- totally changed the mood of the day. We watched some movies, talked a lot- it was a good day.

Sunday I slept most of the day ( oops- I never do that,lol) today I dealt w/ the tire and hung w/ my friend. That means that tomorrow I better get all my stuff done that I gotta get done.

My dad is coming over tomorrow to help do all the guy stuff that needs to be done around here. He is just the best dad a gal could ask for I tell you.

Well, I'm off..........

yo

So I am out of titles again,lol.

I was forced to update this blogger account. You know I was forced to, otherwise I would never have switched to the new and improved blogger. I dislike change and for goodness sake- what was wrong w/ the old blogger. It says nothing has changed, but it is new and improved............ whatever.

I can now blog in Hindu. Cool- I will get right on that.

OK- so I am so tired. I have not been able to fall asleep before 11 one night this week- what the heck is that about?? And I had my first dream about work last night- ugh!

I am really liking my job now- I have some more skills- I don't feel clueless all day
(just part of it)

I scrapbooked last night for the first time in ages, since my friend Vivian was here from Texas. I need to get back in the habit. I think I don't scrap as often since I don't have large blocks of time all at once like I used to. How did I used to do that when I worked before.... I forget,lol.

I got my guitar out the night before that also- haven't touched that in at least a year. I think I suck, Joel was impressed,lol. Honestly I don't play well- just good enough that 3 and 4 yr olds don't throw stuff at you.

Most heard phrases around our house these days........................
"Who drank all the sweet tea?"
"It is not my turn to let in the dogs"
"Are you ever going to cook, mom?"
"Who made this mess?"
"Can you turn down your radio?"
and since gas is 3 freaking dollars a gallon... "Mom... can I have some more money?"

josh at his last paintball tourney

 

Josh had the opportunity to go to CA for a pump paintball tournament. He had an awesome time. His team did not do well, but they are going to another tournament this weekend so they have another chance at well, whatever they have a chance at,lol.

Joel is in San Luis,AZ today playing baseball. San Luis is right on the border of Mexico, and when he is there his phone actually thinks he is in Mexico. It is a good hike from here, and I have TONS to do so I am just staying home today.

This week is National Telecommunicators Week.( I had no idea there was such a thing, but 911 dispatchers are recognized nationally this week, and our fire and police depts take the time to acknowledge us I guess) Our Fire Chief had a dinner for us last night, and I got to meet some of the people that work in that department. That was pretty cool. They have all been working together for quite awhile so I got to hear lots of funny stories, and get some history.

I am now down 27 lbs and my pants do not fit,lol. I tried to buy pants over the weekend but did not have any luck. I am going to have to head out of town I am afraid.

OK- lots to do and little time... peace out. 

It's official.....

I am old.

I was at walmart yesterday. I was there the day before, but since I am old I forgot several things and had to go back.

There were lots of young families there, little kids, young cute mommies. They were buying beach towels, sand toys, diapers, etc. I was buying splints for my wrists ( work is killing me,lol) rolaids, and air freshener cuz my teenage sons stink.

Time marches on......

no good deed goes unpunished...

So almost 2 weeks ago I was in a car accident. Totally not my fault, but as usual, the not at fault person gets screwed the worst,lol.

I was rear ended in the freeway, we were both going fast ( him obviously faster than me,lol). I have pretty significant damage to my car, and I actually had whiplash. I felt good last week and now, I am still having some problems so I am gonna have to get that looked at I guess.

He did stop and pull over, and was a pretty nice guy about the whole thing. I would never have known who hit me ( it was dark) had he not stopped. He called his insurance right away, they gave me a policy number and I decided not to call the police. All I wanted was compensation for my car.

Well, his insurance company is now jacking me around. I just started my new job and really don't have the time or energy to deal w/ this, ya know?I contaced an attorney today, so hopefully that will get things started.

I talked w/ John a little bit this weekend. I miss him. I wish I knew where this was going. I guess we never do- you know the saying.. If you want to hear God laugh, tell him your plans. I have had my entire life planned out since the first day of kindergarten. Needless to say.. it hasn't quite worked out as I thought,lol. I have had to re invent myself now for the third time. It sure gets harder as you get older, but at the same time, I am really liking my life right now. I like the people that I work w/, I am starting to feel more competent, I am comfortable in my own skin for the first time in as long as I can remember.

Welp... he's gone

and I am so sad! I feel like a big ol dork- I didn't really know John that long, but there will be an emptiness w/ him gone.

I also feel like a dork because, for heaven's sakes, I just ended a 10 year relationship and I was much less upset about that. Like really happy, lol not upset at all, and here I am, knowing John for 6 weeks or whatever, and I feel kicked in the gut.

I knew he was leaving the day I met him. I thought it was going to be in July, at first, and that was cool w/ me, cuz after all- I wasn't looking. Then, it got moved up to April, but I was still fine, cuz we were just having fun.

Then, we started having feelings for eachother, things got intense. I still knew he was leaving, but we were supposed to be able to see eachother one more time. Just once more. That was the plan. Now, I dunno what the plan is. If we had known eachother longer, we could have decided what the plan was.

Things change, we have no control over them. The heart wants what the heart wants. Will I ever see him again? Will I ever hear his voice again? Is he being honest about why he is leaving? Does he really want to come back and see me again? I don't want to see anyone else, but how long does a person not see someone else? I guess you don't see anyone else as long as you don't want to, and when you do, then you do.

I guess I have to realize that I have no regrets here. I would have still done everything exactly the same- you know, I could have missed the pain, but then I would have missed the dance.(Thanks Garth). I learned so much, had so much fun, found the type of man I would like to see myself with. Hopefully, someday, it is him. If not, then I had a great ride and met someone who was great to know.

time for a break

from work that is. I have a lot of studying to do for work- lots of codes/abbreviations to learn. My brain feels all mushy so I am taking a break.

My kids are also on Spring Break this week, and I am off until Thursday, so we will be taking a break together.

I have a cold- which sux,lol. I hardly ever get sick, but alas, it happened.

So many exciting things happening in my life right now. The gal who is training me at work is happy w/ my progress, even if I am feeling frustrated. Joel is headed to ASU Frosh orientation this week. I guess that is happening to Joel, but it is happening to me too. He's got one foot out the door already,lol.

I am feeling mostly settled here in my new place. I started hanging things on the wall, organizing stuff and continuing to decide what to get rid of.

I have started going out more. I love karaoke,lol- kinda hokey huh? I have been trying to go at least once a week.

I have lost 15 lbs since Jan- pretty happy about that. Yeah, I'm trying,lol. People ask, are you trying?? Well duh- how else do they think it's happening? No Aladin's lamp here w/ a genie asking me for any wishes.

And the craziest freaking thing happened to me about a month ago. A girlfriend of mine, and her cousin were begging me to go out w/ them. We usually like different things ( they dance, I don't, and I don't listen to the type of music they listen to, and they usually head out of town to go out) but this time, they wanted to go somewhere in town. I almost cancelled at the last minute, but I had cancelled lunch w/ her two days before. I was tired, feeling down, but I drug myself out. I was having a good time. There weren't very many people there, so I got a lot of turns to sing. There was this goofy guy hitting on my friend, she was talking to him. He was at the table w/ two other guys. I was uneasy cuz I know how this goes, ya know? 3 guys, 3 girls. Only this girl isn't interested.

I got up to go to the restroom and when I came back out, one of the guys from that table was standing in the lobby waiting to talk to me. " Oh man" I thought to myself. I was SO not interested. I was honestly there just to sing. I have mentioned my man troubles here- I so don't need any more. I am just gonna raise my kids, learn my new job and move on w/ my life.
We talk a little bit, and for some reason he facinates me. He is confident. I like that. He talks about himself, he asks me about me. I like that too. He's "into" me- I like that too. I don't really care about his motives at that point- I was enjoying talking w/ him, walking w/ him. It was fun, nice. I am intoxicated by his confidence.

I give him my phone number, and we say we are going to meet the next evening. He was a little- OK, a lot pushy when I was leaving to go home, I was waaaay pissed off, so I had decided to wait until tuesday to meet him for dinner. My kids had the next day off of school, so we were all going to hang together anyway.

We meet for dinner the day after that and I was so darn nervous,lol No clue why- I had no reason to be, remember I was not going to date anyone,lol. No getting involved, this was just dinner. But, who knows why- I just was.

Again, he was confident- have I mentioned how much I like that?? I did not realize how much energy I have been wasting dealing w/ insecure men. It is just plain exhausting dealing w/ them. There is nothing I can say to this guy that makes him defensive. We disagree on some fairly important issues ( at least to me) and he is confident enough about himself to discuss them w/o getting all weird. Love that.

I am learning so much about myself, well remembering things I used to know, I guess. Love that too.

Ok, well, we continue to go out, and he has to leave AZ for business. He was here on business. This sux. LOL.

I don't even hear from him for a week. I figure I won't ever hear from him again. I was a little sad, I was having a lot of fun. He was challenging to me, in a good way. Made me think. Reminded me I was a woman, not just a mom. He reminded me what I would be looking for in a man, if I was looking. But- I'm not.

Ok now I'm looking. I don't want to give up on sharing my life w/ someone. I love taking care of people and darn it, the people I am taking care of now are going to move out,lol.

Out of the blue, he calls. My heart flips. Woah. It was just a chat. He is still out of state, and who knows when/if he is coming back. It was great to hear from him. He's gonna call me again sometime.

Sometime came a few hrs later,lol Maybe I'm on his mind as much as he is on mine?? We had a great talk that afternoon, talked on and on about stuff. I feel so great, starting to feel like a woman again, starting to be comfortable in my own skin again. Feeling more adequate. Maybe I have something to offer someone. Maybe if I am more careful this time, I could pick someone worth picking.

We talk almost every day that week. It feels like we are getting closer, even tho we are miles away.

All of a sudden I get a call that he's back. I'm over the moon,lol. We see eachother. I can't get enough of this guy. I feel so great when we talk, when we see eachother. The best part of it though, is the way I feel when I am not w/ him. I still feel good. I look forward to seeing him again, yes, but I also feel good about ME. And that is just awesome.

My feelings are very strong. I think his are too. We both have things on our plate though. The timing stinks. LOL.

He's leaving again in 2 weeks, and this time for a long time. It's a big bummer, but it's ok too. We talked about continuing to talk to eachother, and seeing eachother again. I'm gonna be fine. I have lots of loose ends to tie up anyway, and lots of things I need/want to do.
Well, that is the story of me, and john. We'll see where this leads.

week one...

ok- I can already see why my co workers don't know what day it is.... I have lost my internal clock/calendar already,lol. I thought yesterday was monday, and not sure what I thought today was,lol.

This job is very different than teaching, in that it is much less physical.When I was teaching, I was draggin my butt home every day, and w/ this, even though the shifts are much longer, I am ready to run around after sitting most of the day.

My kids are doing ok, they have risen to the occasion- they are having to help more w/ chores, and getting some things done that are really not their favorites.

Josh is in California at a paintball tourney.That is super fun for him. He is really proud of himself, and hopefully it goes well.

anyway- I'm off- more coming soon

ok- it's time!

This will probably be the longest post in history- so make sure you have a favorite drink, and that you have a comfy seat!

There have been many things happening to me lately, that for various reasons I have had to keep under wraps. I am going to start at what I feel is the beginning and go on from there.

A little over 2 years ago, my husband had a very serious heart condition ( he had an ascending aortic dissection- the condition that killed John Ritter). He almost died, and was hospitalized for a little over two weeks. At that time I found out that he was drinking heavily and also smoking.
( Neither of these cause this heart condition, however they made his recovery much more difficult) There are a variety of reasons that I did not know he was drinking/smoking, but I suppose that is another post and not really relevant to this story.

He came home from the hospital, participated in physical therapy and the other parts of his recovery process, and returned to work.During the time he was home, we went to marriage counseling and I believed we were on the right track. Kind of a second chance at life, so to speak.

That did not last very long, and by the end of that first year, he was again drinking heavily. I was "paying attention" this time,lol so I caught it. I again got him to go to counseling w/ me, but he would not go alone, and tackle his alcohol problem.

Around that time, he was diagnosed w/ a couple of other medical problems, again not related to alcohol, which really is to his detriment since he now believes that I am the root of his medical problems, and since alcohol is not the cause, it must be good for him.

I dealt with this the best I could, continuing to try to support/help him. After about 6 months of that, I realized that I am not going to be able to fix this- I am going to have to save myself/my children.

I begin a job search, since during my marriage I was a SAHM. Do I go back into teaching( which I love more than almost anything, but was difficult w/ my own health problems) or do I look for something that will pay a bit better and possibly not have the physical demands of being a preschool teacher.

A friend of mine is a 911 dispatcher, and after toying w/ the idea of it, and deciding how it would work w/ my children, I decide to apply.

My husband gets upset- why am I doing that, etc. I was honest w/ him that I am protecting myself/my children, in case he is unable to get it together.

He starts to "get it together"- at least on the surface. Again, this is very short lived.

The process to become a 911 dispatcher is long. It is taking forever,lol. There are tests, checks, and lots of delays.

A couple of days after New Years ( now we are in '07,lol) I get a knock on my door. It is the Sherriff telling me that I have 15 days to leave the house I had lived in for the last 10 years. This house was not a dream house to most- but I loved everything about it.

It seems my husband had decided that he no longer wanted to pay any bills. He wants to be free from all responsibilty and have lots of money to "party and invest in the lottery". I am now left to find someone that wants to rent to someone who has just had a forclosure ( thankfully the loan was not in my name and thus not the forclosure) and move my life to another place.

I found a nice place, and was able to keep all of my animals ( I have some livestock, in addition to dogs)and am still in my kids' school district, and am fairly settled in. I am beginning to like it here. My kids like it here- and are feeling good that the stress and drama has left our lives.

Finally after much waiting, testing and such ( I even had to take a polygraph,lol) I was officially offered my job, and will be starting on Monday. I had orientation this week, and am happy with the benefit package and the cost of said benefits.

This has been a rough ride for me, but I am feeling good about where I am headed and what my new life has in store for me. Thanks all for reading this, and for being good friends to me, even when you had no idea what was happening in my life.

whaddareyagonnadoaboudit?

It has been brought to my attention that I am a bad blogger. I would totally agree w/ you, but that is not my nature.
I have so much to say, but I can't yet. Once I have the go ahead- I will be able to tell ya'll everything. Then you will be wishing that I would shush already. I promise. Trust me. It's good, and worth the wait.( OK I dunno about that part but it sounds good.)
Take care... until next time...
Lisa

just a wee update

I got a call today from the commander of the police dept I am hoping to dispatch for. I must have given a wrong address for a reference, so I had to go get the right addy and call it in. He said that is all we are waiting on, and since I don't have any concerns about his reference- I am really starting to feel good about this!!
I was getting worried and applied for two jobs on friday that were in my former field ( early childhood ed). I would prefer the dispatcher job, so hopefully that all does work out, but I felt like I needed some eggs in another basket so to speak.
all right- one of my kids is bugging for thier turn so I am off!

okee dokee

still here,lol.
Still not working, but progress is being made. I know they have checked references, and I have not recieved a thanks, but no thanks, letter. From my experience in working w/ goverment agencies- they are pretty slow,lol.
I have needed the time anyway, to get some other things settled, so like they say, everything happens for a reason.


I am excited that spring is almost here in az. I have been walking around my yard, trying to decide what is next on my project list.


I have been good about getting rid of things lately. Almost every day for the past 2 weeks I have taken at least one box to goodwill. I will probably have a yard sale once it warms up, and donate what doesn't sell. Then, what a great feeling I will have to only have the things I need and love around me- instead of all the packrat stuff I have been saving for who knows what reason,lol.


My favorite dog of all times, Taz, is getting old. He is 12 now, and still occasionally has bursts of energy and runs around like a puppy, but for the most part, he is really showing his age. He is having trouble getting up the steps to the porch.His hearing is not as sharp as it used to be. He wants to lie on my feet all of the time- he follows me everywhere. He is annoyed at our lively basset hound's non stop energy. I love this dog.


Today, Josh and I are going to my moms to get my hair colored, and to visit his favorite paintball store. I am going to go to bookmans too- with two boxes of books in hand,lol. Bookmans is the best used book store ever. They take books in trade, I usually end up spending more than I earn, but lately, while on my decluttering mission, I have racked up quite a store credit- fearing that I will have to dust one more book if I bring it home,lol.
Joel, being of sound mind and independant body- thinks going with Josh and I to grandmas sounds like a form of torture, so he isn't gonna go.

when life hands you lemons........

make lemonade! That is the month,year, life I am having right now,lol. I am struggling w/ some things, but I feel more mentally healthy than I have in a long time. Lots of changes happening in my life. Change=stress for me. However, each and every one of these changes will be for the best.... at some point.

On the job front, things are still progressing, I have a polygraph scheduled for next week. If I haven't mentioned it, I am just completely and totally freaked out at the idea of taking this test. I don't have any reason to be freaked out. Hopefully I rise to this occasion and just do fine.

My oldest son Joel has been busy at work practicing his "lawyer skills" He debates every issue. It is less than wonderful,lol. He is becoming independant and has lost his desire to be part of this family and help out. He and I are identical souls and hopefully he comes around sooner than later.

Josh, who on the surface seems like he could care less about others, on the other hand has been the most supportive wonderful person around.

Take care!